Tuesday’s Love Jones – Building a Little Personal Rome!

How long did it really take to build Rome?

“Rome wasn’t built in a day” is what people say when it comes to waiting patiently for things.
You probably think you know what it means, but not only was Rome not built in a day; it was also at least 1000 year ahead of the rest of the world when it came to engineering.

“Rome was not built in a day” and have no idea how long it took to build Rome. But if it were like any other city, they are probably still working on it. Just like relationships, Cities and countries are always works in progress.

Why, the Romans aqueducts alone brought a constant flow of water from distant sources into cities and towns, supplying public baths, latrines, fountains and private households. Most Roman aqueducts proved reliable, and durable because of the careful, well studied, well planned and specific engineering skills they put into building one of the oldest cites in the world that sustain a population of over 1,000,000 people.

The same building power as the Romans can also holds true for couples. We are not built in a day or even a lifetime. As people, we are never finished until we die and even then we will not be finished, so what makes us THINK that healthy relationships can be built in a short time?

Rome's first aqueduct Put a wedge in it blogs
Side Note: Rome’s first aqueduct was built 312 BC and The aqueduct is a technology that has survived the test of time. Yes, aqueducts are history but they are also progress.


 Essential tools to build a health relationship…

  • Stop – Take a quick pause and pay attention to the current situation in your relationship.
  • Look – Assess the happiness level of your relationship. If there are areas that need looking into…do something!
  • Listen – Take time to listen to your lover…even the things they may not say.
  • Learn – Pay attention to his/her actions.
katrina gurl
If you need a coach……I am right here!!!
  • Grow – Growth comes by putting action towards everything you have evaluated.

LIVE and LEARN. If we truly learn more by living more then it will be an easy adjustment to work on building something strong in your relationship that will last. The real goal is not to finish, but to make progress in your relationships every day. When we work a little each day on something, we eventually create our own individual Rome.

Do you think your relationship can be as powerful and the history of Rome?
Have a happy Tuesday 🙂

Tuesday’s Love Jones – Segue to Fantasies!

segue to fantasiesCoaching couples and helping them with their issues sure can lead one to thinking of a few things in your own life.  My last couple began talking about fantasies with one another, which lead to arguments and a little resentment.  The woman felt that her guy was not even attracted to her after finding out what he really wanted and her fantasy left him feeling less than endowed.

I had a FREE 30 Minute Phone Consultation with them and let the know that there was a better way to begin sharing and that there was no real reason to be upset by the fantasies a person may be having unless there were a way to actually control what randomly popped in persons head.

Let’s face it; sex and imagination are a part of life and fantasies are an important part of sexuality.  The erotic images and ideas that you dream up are what fuel your sexuality and keep you in touch with your desires.  However, respect and boundaries must be at the forefront.

Sharing a fantasy with your lover can be a little uncomfortable, but before you chose not to share let’s figure out a way to segue to your real fantasies.

I can’t stress enough how important it is to share and explore your fantasies with your partner and by sharing your fantasies, you reveal a part of yourself that no one else in the world gets to see. As a result, your intimacy will shoots through the roof.

Here are the top 3 and most common fantasies

  • Domination & Submission

This one is most popular and can range from light bondage to full on BSDM which is Bondage & Submission, Discipline & Masochism.

You can use your hands to hold your partner’s arms over their head while you kiss them, or use a necktie or silk scarf to tie them up. Blindfolding works nicely too. The element of surprise is key…they won’t know where you’ll touch them next and that’s very erotic. This is particularly fun play for someone who’s always in a dominant role in the world; it gives them a chance to reverse roles and be submissive for once.

  • Sexual Stranger Danger

The basic idea is to pretend you don’t know each other

In this common classic fantasy, the sexy (perhaps) exterminator guy comes to the door and you seduce him inside. Or the police officer comes to ask if you’ve seen a suspicious man in the neighborhood and stays to comfort you in your fear.  You get the idea.

  • Innocent but Naughty

Here’s your time to go back to school. Only this time in a skimpy schoolgirl outfits or a naughty librarian.

This one never gets old.  The fantasy take place where the woman who seems innocent either gets seduced by the older more experienced man, or she’s not nearly as innocent as she seems in the first place. Either way, both pupils win!

The Fantasy BoxHere’s a creative way to begin sharing

Create a container for all your fantasies. Use a clear jar or a nice red box and mark it OUR FANTASY BOX.  Take some time to write down your favorite fantasies on slips of paper, fold them up, and put them into the box. Whenever your sex life seems to be a tad routine or predictable, pluck a slip of paper from the box. It’s just like drawing a raffle ticket, but the prize is a chance to make a sexual fantasy come true.

Learning, being open and exploring together as a couple is the way to have great sex and an even better life. The possibilities are limitless, so stay curious about each other and experiment.

Have a happy Tuesday!

~ KitKatCoaching on Youtbe

Good Morning Handsome!

Did you know that the way you are greeted in the morning sets the tone for your day? And, did you know that simply saying “Good Morning” to your lover may be the sexiest thing you say to him or her all day?


The is nothing worse than waking up full aware that last night’s argument has a saga! Not sweating the small stuff is really a thing and if you let the small stuff go, there is way more room for the good stuff, the cool stuff, the romantic stuff…the sexxxxxy stuff!

When you wake up in the morning, kiss your loved one on the forehead and wish them a good day.

A loverly tip that works!

Tuesday’s Love Jones – How Far is too Far to Move for Love?

Tuesday’s Love Jones – How Far is too Far to Move for Love?

This week, I got an e-mail from someone in need of boy advice.  Her and her guy have been online dating for 3 months, they’ve met a few times and have become almost inseparable.  She is  thinking about moving with him, relocating in the next 6 months and wants to know if this is a good idea.


When I read her e-mail, I realized that I never wrote about how I made that decision. However, this isn’t the first e-mail I’ve gotten about long-distance love, so I thought I’d give you some questions to ask yourself to see if you’re ready to make the move.

Online dating has made it easier for us to find love these days  No longer are we limited to our communities, family and friends and thanks to online social media sites like Facebook, finding love can be as easy as click of a button!

Which brings me to this very awesome story straight out of Steamy Trails Publishing’s soon to be released Secret Crush Book #2 where you will meet Atticus and Malina.  Malina lives in New Mexico while the love of her life lived in Georgia.

Anyway (I digress)!!! These are questions you WILL NEED to answer BEFORE you move:

  • Does he want you to move?

Be clear this is something you both want

  • Hey, do you really, really know this guy?

How old is he? What is he looking for in a relationship? What’s his past like, what’s his family like, is he responsible, Do you love and like him? Where does he see his future? Does he have a good job or is he in school…be sure you know what’s really going on with him and trust your gut first.

  • What are you giving up if you move?

You need to think about what you’re risking and create a plan B if things don’t work out.

  • What do you expect from the move?

Do you see marriage in the near future or are you moving so you can have you boy toy at arm’s reach? Think about it!!!

  • Can you handle change?

This is huge. Can you handle being in a new city and the frustrations that come along with it? Even if you aren’t giving up a lot, are you OK with giving up life as you know it?

  • What can you do to protect yourself?

You need to make sure you have an exit strategy before you go. Make sure you have cash saved up to take care of yourself on your own should something go horribly wrong with the move or the relationship.

  • Can you own it?

You have to be able to own it; if you can’t, your big move won’t be nearly as fun because you’ll be caught up in your friends’ and family’s negative opinions. You have to own it — own that you made the choice, own that it might not work out, and make sure people know that you’re telling them, not asking them.

  • Do you have job prospects in the new city?

You need to be familiar with the job market in your field in the new city. If it’s not promising, how long are you emotionally and financially prepared to be out of work?

  • Do you love this person more than the life you have where you live now?

This is a really big one. It’s pretty simple, though; if the answer’s no: do not go! Stay where you are and find someone in your own town who makes your heart sing. I If the answer is “yes”, make sure to address all the other questions before you make the move. This is a big decision, but I promise it has the potential to be one of the most gratifying ones of your whole life. Never pass up a chance to be with the love of your life.


Other stories of long distance love