TLj – Rapturous Bonds!


“Good relationships don’t just happen. They take time, patience, and two people who truly want to be together.” ~Unknown

By now I’m sure that most of of us KNOW that there are no such things as perfect relationships, but however, there are perfect things we can do to make them feel that way.

Trust

Trust is crucial. Period. No ifs or buts. If you are in the relationship for the long term, you simply cannot afford to have trust issues. There is no room for doubt. You have to trust with a full heart that your partner loves you.

Quality Time

Quality time is essential. Do something fun together, do something meaningful, have meaningful conversations, pay attention to each other, and express your love like crazy.

Communication

When you communicate with your loved one, remember that love is the key. Speak from the heart. Have good intentions and be clear. Discuss problems in a loving manner. Practice effective active listening skills; do not interrupt the other person, listen and watch. Be mindful. Remain calm. Be respectful. Be loving.

Small Acts of Kindness

Small acts of kindness have always been a big part of of a good relationship. Small acts are vital. Whether it is a small gift, doing the dishes, or giving a hug, it shows your love and support. Send flowers, send an ecard, or leave a small note on the table. Bake cookies or make breakfast in bed. Give hugs and kisses for no reason other than to show your love.

Express Your Love

Love is always the foundation. It’s nearly obvious, but sometimes so obvious that couples tend to forget about it, and saying “I love you” becomes monotonous. But love is the basis and the reason of your relationship. So express your love through actions, words, and non-verbal communication. Don’t make “I love you” a routine, but instead always, and I do mean always, say it from the heart.

This is Kat’s call and have a rapturous Tuesday!!!

Maxi, Maxi, Maxi – Tuesday’s Love Jones!


Maxi writes in telling me that she’s started a new job and was instantly attracted to a colleague. She says, over the past 3 months her and this college have had to work closely together and that the sexual tension is crazy.

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Maxi shares that she can’t even remember the last time that she’s felt such intense physical attraction with anyone…including with her husband. Jerry (the co-worker), is married also and as the days go by the tension is rising. His flirting is incessantly and if I’m truthful, she says, she  loves every minute of it. He is tall and incredibly attractive. So far, she handles this outwardly by being totally professional all the time, but on the inside she says she is  always tense, full of energy and daydream of how it would feel to be romantically involved with him.

What should I do?

~ Max

In my professional opinion, there are some questions that I need you to ask yourself way before I tell you that you need to get a grip!

1). Do you love your husband?

2). How important is your marriage?

3). What are you missing in your life that you are entertaining this tomfoolery?

Here’s the off the record deal, Maxi! First off, this Jerry guy most likely flirts with every new female employee in the office and you may even notice that the longer your work there.

You, my friend, just so happen to be the new meat in the office.

office-romance-640x431The one thing that this Jerry has already shown you is that he does not respect marriage and you most defiantly should never fall for a guy with such standards. Another thing, he flirts with you because you allow him to. Most men know how to seek out the women that will give them the time of day.

And, as far as the “what should you do question” …well, that is solely up to you. If you think losing or harming your marriage is worth it; by all means carry on. But, if there is a mere chance that you honor your husband, you should begin letting this Jerry know that you are not interested in 100% of your actions.

I’d say that you should use this as fuel to seek what may be wrong in your marriage and work on how to feel that same passion with your own man.  Let this be an eye opening experience and not one that will keep you blind to the true harm this will bring.

If I may play devil’s advocate? Say you and this Jerry do have an office fling. What do you think will come next? Do you think this Jerry will become the love of your life and you two will ride into some sunset? Nah, more than likely, all it will do is cause you to feel guilty, used and uncomfortable every day after the fling at work.

Now, I never like to answer a question with another question, but Maxi…what WILL you do?

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Have a prosperous Tuesday, Maxi!

~ Kat 🙂

Tuesday’s Love Jones – 100 over 50’s!


Did you know that most people in relationships operate according to a 50/50 plan?

Now, I don’t know about you all, but, I for one will never accept anything less than 100% of anything…especially in a marriage or relationship.

Thinking of marriage as a 100/100 relationship, with each person willing to do whatever it takes to make the marriage work will assure the practice of bliss.  For a marriage to thrive, both spouses need to put aside their own desires and seek to serve the other.

For example, as I stated in the video; the hubs and I are spending time together in Arizona during his regular work week. This was relaxation for me, but for him it’s still work as usual. When he decided to wash his truck, I, without even thinking, commenced to cleaning the inside of the truck to help as much as possible for him to finish thing up before heading to work that night.

We were naturally and immediately team getting thing done and helping each other without even having to discuss it.

Tuesday's Love Jones - 100 over 50!

Just imagine waking up each day with a mindset to make your partner’s day a little happier?  Part of giving 100% of yourself is also realizing that this requires you to NOT ONLY worry about you and your own needs in the relationship.  Giving 100% is putting in extra effort that is well worth it for the health of your union.

Marriage is the union of two imperfect people that can sometimes become selfish and less concerned with the feelings of their partner, but if you concentrate on implementing the 100/100 idea in your relationship the outcome of newfound positivity my surprise you.

Have a wonderful Tuesday and remember that 100% is so much better than 50!!!

Too lazy to read? That’s fine, click on slideshare…

Tuesday’s Love Jones – Honey, Does this Make Me Look Fat?!


b2f5ebaa50f5f63130e1adfacee42874Way back in the 90’s it took me only one time to ask my husband that old cliché question: “Honey, do I look fat in this dress?” The answer he gave me caused me to make a pact with myself to never ask him that again!

His answer still rings in my memory along with the confused and ‘is this a trick question’ look on his face.  He said, “Babe, of course you still look a little chubby, you just had a baby.”

***Blank Stare***

There are certain questions that guys can answer honestly, but then there are some honest answers that will be at cost or risk if you will. Just for the record of hear this from a real born female blogger…the question, “Honey, does this dress make me look fat?” That is not a question, it is a trap and you woman does not really want you to be really honest.

There is an entire judgmental world out there that makes us as women feel uncomfortable in just about anything we put on whether she is a size 2 to plus, the last thing she wants to hear is yet another negative comment from the lovebbbb of her life.

Atlas, what do most men do?  They stand up to that trick question with a lie. Ya see, men are not fools that us married women often take them for, they know that a little white lie will ease the pain of the real facts to the presented question. In their minds, in the long run the white lie will keep his penis safe for some good lovin later on.  To a guy the truth of the minor matter is just not worth a lack of sex later. And, in a lot of cases, women withhold sex for all kinds of reasons! LOL!!!

In all actuality, how can a guy answer this loaded, Catch-22? If he answers “yes,” he’s in the doghouse. If he says “no,” he’s ‘not being honest’ and is accused of not paying attention to the small things in the relationship.

Yes, with women one tiny question can be that deep!

As a woman that has lived and learned, I personally think it’s a stupid question.  In my mind, if I feel fat before I put on the dress; not much is going to change after I get into the dress, so why place the guy you’re with smack dab in the middle of your personal drama about your weight and insecurities.  In all honesty, guys…the girls asking this silly question never want to actually hear the truth.

Plus-Size-Fashion-Inspirations-plus-size-womens-clothes-30606957-900-1350Next time this question is asked, use humor to back yourselves out of this trap…

Woman: “Honey, does this dress make me look fat?”
Man: “If that is what fat girls are looking like these days, sign me up!”

True story, this is what a friend said to his wife when she asked the dreadful question and then he kissed her on his check and quickly walked out of the room.  A seasoned married man knows just what to do.  He basically agreed with her, but his response also let her know that he still thinks she looks good no matter the extra pounds.

At the end of the day, that’s all a girl really wants is to know that she is still desirable even in this vain world to the man she loves.

To my guy readers, that is truly part of the stem to that question.

Too bad ‘Put A Wedge In It Blogs’ couldn’t have helped poor Abe! LOL!

Have a happy Tuesday!