TLj – First Comes Lust, then Comes Love!


If you were wondering if it’s truelove, or just lust…here’s how to tell!

Did you know that falling in love actually happens over time, and the journey frompawiiblogs2initial attraction to deep romantic love is a predictable course that depends on many different factors?

Love is an intense feeling of affection toward another person. It’s a profound and caring attraction that forms emotional attachment. On the flip side, lust is a strong desire of a sexual nature that is based on physical attraction. Lust can transform into deep romantic love, but it usually takes time.

Two individuals will transform their lust into love when they get to see the whole individual (their strengths and weaknesses) and get past the “fantasy” level.

pawiiblogs3First Stage of Lust

Lust is the first stage of falling in love. It’s driven by desire. The sex hormones play an important role in this stage. According to experts, this stage may begin immediately and can last up to two years.

What Lust Looks Like in this Stage:

  • You’re focused on the physical appearance of the object of your desire.
  • There is a strong desire to have sex, but not deep emotional conversations.
  • You’d rather keep the relationship on a fantasy level, not discuss real feelings.
  • You are lovers, but not necessarily friends.

Second Stage of Lust is Attraction

This is the “love-struck” phase. When you spend hours daydreaming about your lover; when you lose sleep or your appetite, you know you’re in this phase. The neurohormones that play an important role in the attraction or infatuation phase are dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin. These are the hormones that send our heart racing, and might actually make us feel like we are going insane.

Finally, Comes Love and Attachment

When a couple has gotten to know themselves beyond the courting phase and they get to see their partner’s “whole” personality, including their strengths and weaknesses, and still choose to love and accept each other for who they are, a neurohormone of love called oxytocin takes over. This is the commitment hormone. It’s released during orgasm and believed to promote bonding when adults are intimate.

Signs of the Truest Love

This type of love is not just an emotion, it’s also a craving. There is a strong emotional craving, the love drive is even stronger than the sex drive.

  • Possessiveness. When you desire only that one person, you know you are in deep romantic love.
  • You want to spend quality time together other than sex.
  • You get lost in conversations and forget about the hours passing.
  • You want to honestly listen to each other’s feelings and make each other happy.
  • He or she motivates you to be a better person.
  • You want to get to meet his or her family and friends.
  • You can’t stop thinking about that person.

At this stage, instead of a split between love and lust, your new path lies in the balancing of the two: committed love and red hot sex, security and excitement, continuity and novelty, safety and adventure, comfort and passion. The happiest couples are the ones that can maintain a balance between lust and love.

katrina gurl 3Kat’s Call: Enjoy the journey of this amazing discovery relating with someone for whom you lust. If the chemistry is right, it will transform into romantic love! Who knows, you may just be lusting you future husband/wife!!!

Don’t rush it! Allow it to unfold naturally. The more you bring love, honesty, passion and romance into your own self-relationship, the easier it will be to attract someone who shares those same qualities.

You may also want to read: 

RePost Monday – Is Lust Okay?
Lust Among Spouses – Sinful or Not?

TLj – Rapturous Bonds!


“Good relationships don’t just happen. They take time, patience, and two people who truly want to be together.” ~Unknown

By now I’m sure that most of of us KNOW that there are no such things as perfect relationships, but however, there are perfect things we can do to make them feel that way.

Trust

Trust is crucial. Period. No ifs or buts. If you are in the relationship for the long term, you simply cannot afford to have trust issues. There is no room for doubt. You have to trust with a full heart that your partner loves you.

Quality Time

Quality time is essential. Do something fun together, do something meaningful, have meaningful conversations, pay attention to each other, and express your love like crazy.

Communication

When you communicate with your loved one, remember that love is the key. Speak from the heart. Have good intentions and be clear. Discuss problems in a loving manner. Practice effective active listening skills; do not interrupt the other person, listen and watch. Be mindful. Remain calm. Be respectful. Be loving.

Small Acts of Kindness

Small acts of kindness have always been a big part of of a good relationship. Small acts are vital. Whether it is a small gift, doing the dishes, or giving a hug, it shows your love and support. Send flowers, send an ecard, or leave a small note on the table. Bake cookies or make breakfast in bed. Give hugs and kisses for no reason other than to show your love.

Express Your Love

Love is always the foundation. It’s nearly obvious, but sometimes so obvious that couples tend to forget about it, and saying “I love you” becomes monotonous. But love is the basis and the reason of your relationship. So express your love through actions, words, and non-verbal communication. Don’t make “I love you” a routine, but instead always, and I do mean always, say it from the heart.

This is Kat’s call and have a rapturous Tuesday!!!

Happy Veterens Day – Eat for Free Today!!!


Several area restaurants are offering something free for veterans and active duty military personnel to thank them for their military service for Veterans Day, Nov. 11.

This is cool to know…

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Oldest World War II vet Richard Overton, 109, honored by President Obama (November 10, 2013). “Oldest living WWII vet to meet with Obama”. Born: May 11, 1906 Bastrop County, Texas, TX Battles and wars: Pacific Ocean theater of World War II Service/branch: United States Army Allegiance: United States of America.

Now get some FREE FOOD…

All you Need is: Proof of Military Service.Most companies require some form of military ID. These include: a Military ID Card (active/reserve/retired), VA ID card, Current Leave and Earnings Statement (LES), Drivers License with Veterans Designation, Photograph in uniform, wearing your uniform (if your service permits), Veterans Organization Card (e.g., American Legion and VFW), DD214, discharge paperwork, or other form of identification. Note, there is a New Federal Veterans ID Card coming soon. Other restaurants and companies may go by the honor system.

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Second, always call ahead to verify locations, times, and participation. Many of the listed companies are franchises and may have different policies. We will do our best to keep this page updated as we find new info.

applebees

Applebee’s – free meal, Nov. 11, 2015: Last year, Applebee’s served over one million free meals to military veterans and active servicemembers. Applebee’s is again offering a free meal to military veterans and active-duty service members on Veterans Day, Wednesday, Nov. 11, 2015. There will be 7 entrées to choose from, beverage and gratuity not included. Military ID or proof of service required. More.

Bar Louie, Free meal on Nov. 10th and 11th, 2015.From open to close November 10th and 11th every Bar Louie location across the country will offer veterans and military personnel a free meal up to a $12 value. Available at participating locations, military ID or proof of service is required. Locations.

BJs Restaurant and Brewhouse, Nov. 11, 2015. Free entree, up to $12.95 value. Offer valid to all active duty military and veterans, with proof of service. More infoLocations.

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Bob Evans, Nov. 11, 2015. Free All you can eat hotcakes. For active duty military and veterans with ID or proof of service. More InfoLocations.

Bonanza Steakhouse, Nov. 11, 2015. Free Veterans Day buffet at participating locations. More infoLocations.

Brann’s Steakhouse and Grille. Free 6 oz Sirloin and two sides. Locations.

Buehler’s Grocery, Nov. 11, 2015. Free breakfast menu meal for veterans and active duty military. From 7:00 am until 11:00 am at participating locations.Locations.

Buffalo’s Cafe, Nov. 11, 2015. Free meal at participating locations. Locations.

Calhoun’s Restaurant, Nov. 11, 2015. Free meal, choice of Hickory Smoked Bar-B-Que Half Slab of Ribs, Hickory Smoked Bar-B-Que Pork Plate, “Ale” Steak, Fresh Chicken Calhoun, and Southern Fried Catfish. Proof of Service required.Locations.

California Pizza Kitchen, Nov. 11, 2015. Choose a pizza, full size salad, or pasta from the special Veterans Day Menu. Dine-in only. Please come in uniform or bring your military I.D. or other proof of service. Find a location near you

TLj – The Object of Deception!


Dear Pawii Blogs,

I’ve fallen in love with a married man. We’ve had great times together and have even had sleepovers. He says that his wife has been cheating on him for years and now they are only together for the kids and financial conveniences.

Sleeping_CoupleA week ago he told me all of a sudden that he needed to take a leave of absence from work to stay home with his now ailing wife and that we couldn’t see each other anymore, because he owed his wife this time.

I haven’t told him yet that I see his wife often at my gym and she’s as healthy as a horse. I want to confront him face to face but I can’t imagine what would make him lie to this extent.

I will be very grateful to have some advice as to how to deal with this
Thanks a lot,
(Just call me girl interrupted)

IMG_3870The Coach says:

People have affairs for many different reasons, girl interrupted and to name a few…to escape from a bad relationship, an opportunity presents itself, a high sex drive, the thrill of excitement, and so on.

However, sometimes affairs are driven by love. People fall in love with someone who they love more than their spouse. Affairs driven by love, however, are usually anything but fun. They are full of stress, agony and regret.

But, please also be aware that some people actually thrive on cheating and manipulating others simply because they can. Some men people get a kick out of making other people fall in love, only to break their hearts. For them, love is a game, affairs are short-lived and full of lies and emotional manipulation.

If you are the victim of someone who is playing games with your heart, he has probably told you everything you wanted to hear, regardless of the truth.
And while such affairs are fun and exciting, they usually don’t last. People, who start these types of affairs, sweep their victims of their feet, but then they lose interest when their victims fall in love.

Unfortunately, your situation sounds more like someone playing games (i.e., “my wife cheats on me”) than someone who is genuinely in love with you. If he is truly in lovesigns-your-boyfriend-is-just-not-into-you-02 with you, he would not have told you such lies. Plus, he has most likely started a new affair and is ridding himself of you because the amount of work it would take to hide 2 lovers from his wife.

And if he is playing games with you, confronting him will only make things worse. If you confront him, he’ll only tell you more lies leaving more confused than you are now.
While this may be hard to hear, it is probably best not to investment more time or energy in this situation. In the long run, very little is likely to come of it.

Sorry, girl interrupted! The only thing that needs interruption here is you from that sociopath. Please run quickly before real regret hits!!!

Also, I’d like to inbox you for a private session to understand better why you think it is okay to settle for a relationship like this. If that’s okay???

Thanks for allowing us to share your story here.
Hope this helps you and others to have an incisive Tuesday!

~ Kat

 

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