Tuesday’s Love Jones – See with Emotional Eyes!

Miranda LambertIn today’s entertainment news:  #OHSOSAD!  Miranda Lambert fought back tears as she sang “The House That Built Me.” Just days before announcing her split from Blake Shelton, the 31-year-old country singer broke down a bit during her Cheyenne Frontier Days concert in Wyoming. “The last thing someone wants to do is cry in front of 19,000 people,” she told the audience as she tried to keep from crying while singing the ballad. They were so perfect together and I hate to see them split after only 4 years!!! WATCH THE VID

Now to Tuesday’s Love Jones – See with Emotional Eyes by Katrina Gurl

Last week I had to really brainstorm some ideas for a new post, as I love to make sure that everything I write is current and from a fresh point of view. Then it hit me and this is timeless. When couples get comfortable with one another, the one thing we forget to do is remain in awe of our mate.

Though familiarity may not breed contempt, it takes off the edge of admiration. – William Hazlitt

Nothing is wonderful when you get used to it. – Edgar Watson Howe

If your relationship with your partner doesn’t feel fresh, new and exciting try these things to your union a boost.Tuesday's Love Jones - See with Emotional Eyes!

Stop being too busy to see one another…I mean see with the emotional eye

The best gift you can give someone you love is the purity of your full presence.  Presence is complete awareness, or paying full attention to “the now.”  If you do not find at least some amount of presence in the moments you share with your partner, it is impossible to listen, speak, compromise, or otherwise connect with them on a meaningful level.

Never underestimate a good compliment to one another

The secret to a healthy, lasting relationship is not about how many days, months, or years you’ve been together, it’s about how much you truly love each other every day.  You must directly express this love through your words and actions.  It seems like such a small thing, but in our busy lives we often forget that a kind word, a helping hand, or just a smile and a quick “thank you” can create a bright spot in your partner’s life.

Remember that compromising is a sign of strength and love

Good relationships don’t just happen, and they aren’t built solely on a foundation of convenience.  They take time, patience, effort, and two people who want to be together and are willing to meet in the middle.  When there’s a disagreement, they work out a solution that works for both parties, a compromise, rather than a need for the other person to change or completely give in.

Stop the need to be right.

When it comes to closest relationships, you don’t always have to be right, you just have to not be too worried about being wrong.  Ask yourself, “Will it matter a year from now?”  Oftentimes it’s far better to be kind than to be right.

Keeping secrets sucks

You attract a person by the qualities you show them, you keep them around based on the qualities you truly possess.  Problems and flaws are a part of everyone’s life.  If you try to hide them, you don’t give the person who loves you a chance to truly know you and love you fully. As flawed as you might be, as out of place as you sometimes feel, and as lacking as you believe you are, you don’t have to hide the imperfect pieces of yourself from your partner.

They see your flaws as features that make you interesting, and they see your problems simply as a sign that you’re human too. By hiding things from your partner, you allow small problems to escalate and dominate both your life and your relationship.  If you make a mistake, it might be irritating, but don’t bury it inside you.  Be open about it, address it, and move on.  Our problems are really our blessings if we use them to grow stronger, both as individuals and as couples.  (Read Daring Greatly.)

Learn to forgive not get even

Getting even doesn’t help a relationship heal.  If you’re feeling pain, don’t take action that creates even more pain.  Don’t try to cover darkness with darkness.  Find the light.  Act out of love.  Do something that will enable you to move forward towards a more fulfilling reality. If your partner makes a mistake that hurts you, and you want your relationship grow beyond it, you have to start with forgiveness.  Without it, the potential for long-term happiness in a relationship is impossible.

You don’t forgive your partner because you’re weak; you forgive them because you’re strong enough to know that human beings make mistakes.  Forgiveness is giving up your craving to hurt them for hurting you.  It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened.  It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move forward with your life… and hopefully move forward with your relationship too.

In closing

The greatest relationships take a great deal of work.  They don’t just happen, or maintain themselves.  They thrive only when two people make an effort and take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their heads and hearts. Keep in mind that every couple has ups and downs, every couple argues, and that’s the way it should be…you’re a partnership, and partnerships can’t function without regular communication and compromise.  When you don’t talk it out, there’s a lot of important stuff that ends up not getting said.

Have a wonderful Tuesday!

Tuesday's Love Jones - See with Emotional Eyes by Katrina Gurl

~ Katrina


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